How to Break the Cycle of Worry

In Matthew chapter 6, Jesus gives one of His most profound and comprehensive teachings on overcoming worry. With three simple words: "Do not worry," Jesus presents a case against the worry epidemic that He is sure will attack us in this fallen World. If you've lived long enough, I'm sure you have experienced some form of worry, and the Bible has a lot to say about this problem. In this bible study, learn the three steps Jesus teaches to break the cycle of worry. Enjoy!

In Matthew chapter 6, Jesus gives one of His most profound and comprehensive teachings on overcoming worry. With 3 simple words: “Do not worry,” Jesus presents a case against the epidemic of worry that He is sure will attack us in this fallen World. If you've lived long enough , I'm sure that you, too have experienced some form of worry, and the Bible has a lot to say about this problem. The good thing for us is that what the Bible has to say is helpful for us to overcome worry so that we can experience God's peace even when everything in our lives isn't perfect, and we are unsure of what tomorrow will hold.

Welcome to Monday morning Bible study at Beloved Women. I’m Christina Patterson. If you are new here, please be sure to subscribe so you don’t miss any of our videos to help you learn, love, and live God’s Word and for those of you returning, welcome back. Thank you so much for watching, commenting, and sharing, as it truly helps us to reach more women with the love and truth of Jesus Christ. 

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Today, we’re opening our Bibles to Matthew 6:25-34 to learn how to break the cycle of worry. In Matthew 6:25, Jesus starts His teaching on worry with the words:

He goes on to give argument after argument as to why we should not worry. We'll discuss those reasons soon enough, but there was a word in this verse that I have overlooked my entire life that makes a huge connection between the worry we experience and why we experience that worry.

It’s the very first word that you see in Matthew 6:25: “Therefore.” This simple word tells us that there is a reason why Jesus is telling us not to worry, and we find it in the verses before He says, “Therefore.” 

We have to understand that Jesus doesn’t just randomly start talking about worry for no reason. There's a connection between what He previously said and this teaching on worry in Matthew chapter 6:25-34. So what was He talking about that then led Him to stay “therefore do not worry”? He was talking about not being able to serve God and worldly possessions at the same time. He sums up His thoughts in verse 24, where He says:

Jesus is making it clear that we have a choice to make. Either we will look to God or the things of this world. We simply can’t do both. We have to choose. Now, what happens if we don't choose? What happens if we try to straddle the fence and serve both God and money? Both God and worldly possessions? When we try to do both, worry is the result.

When we have one foot in the world and one in the Kingdom, we will be filled with worry and anxiety, so Jesus is telling us to be completely devoted to God because when you do, worry and anxiety won’t control you. 

Now I’m not talking about the normal concern we should all have in the face of danger or harm. I’m not talking about anxiety that needs medical professional assistance. The worry we are talking about is an overconcern for things that are out of our control. 

Any time that we are battling with worry it is because we are facing the tension of trying to seek the things of this world and seek the kingdom of God at the same time. The very thing Jesus warns us we cannot do. It’s not even possible, yet we try.

Have you ever wondered why people that are not of God and are completely against Him seem to not struggle with worry and seem so at peace? It’s because they are not divided. Now, they have chosen the wrong path, and although they may seem at peace, now the path they are on will lead to destruction. Yet because they are completely settled on the decision they have made, they are not struggling with worry. Not because they made the right decision but because they made a decision and are not trying to go two separate ways. Now prayerfully, the Holy Spirit will convict them and lead them to the path of Jesus Christ because just because you don’t have worry, doesn’t mean you have a right relationship with God. 

So how much more peace can we as Christians have when we decide to go all in with God and make His Kingdom our focus? But when we don’t, we will find ourselves in what I call the cycle of worry.

The cycle of worry works as follows:

• First, we look at our life and we see or sense there is a need or deficit.
• Second, we seek to control and fulfill that need in our own strength and apart from God.
• Third, either we don’t achieve what we are looking for or we achieve it and are still unsatisfied, so we find ourselves back at realizing our need and deficit.

Then the cycle continues and we’re left consumed by this need, always striving to fix it even if it's out of our control, allowing worry to rule, lead, and govern our lives instead of God. What you’ll recognize about the cycle of worry is that God is not in it. The worry that Jesus is talking about in Matthew 6 is our striving to fix what only God can fix, heal what only God can heal, change what only God can change. This is why the cycle is never-ending unless it’s broken. 

In Matthew 6, Jesus gives us a very practical framework for breaking the cycle of worry. Let’s look deeper at what He teaches so we can break this cycle to live in peace. Matthew 6:25-34 says:

Now there is a healthy level of concern we should all have, a heightened sense of awareness we should maintain to protect us from danger, but this is not the type of worry Jesus is talking about. Jesus is talking about when instead of serving the purpose to warn and protect, our overconcern rules and controls us. So Jesus tells us three things to do to overcome each stage of the cycle of worry; look at the birds, consider the lilies of the field, and seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness. 

So I want to explore each of these directions that Jesus gives us so that we can exit the crazy cycle of worry and enter the peace and rest of God. 

1. Look at the birds of the air.

The first point we get on the cycle of worry is usually when we realize something is missing or we think something is missing from our lives. Often today, we’ll find ourselves satisfied until we get on social media and compare our whole lives to the highlights of someone else's life and start to feel empty. Now I want to say there are many times where that void is very real, we’ve lost something, we’ve been deprived of a relationship that we desire, we have wounds that need healing, and real needs in this world. So regardless if our identifying that need is through comparison or real life circumstances, we all still experience the vacuous deficit this need leaves and we desire for this void to be filled.  When worry is leading our lives, it’s at this point that we forget that God is the One who provides all our needs. He’s the one that fills our empty spaces. And so Jesus says “look at the birds of the air” they don’t sow or reap or gather yet God feeds them. 

We’re worried because we fear we won’t be taken care of if we don’t always do it ourselves. But if God will take care of a bird that is not made in His image, how much more will He take care of you?

Much of our struggle with worry is our striving for the things of this world so we can “store up for ourselves” and Jesus says in Matthew 6:19 because we fear running out and not having enough. But God has not given us a spirit of fear, so this motivation does not come from Him. If the birds don’t store up, why should we? How do we store up? We overwork to get more and more money to fill our desire for provision. We don’t set healthy boundaries to store up relationships even if they are unhealthy to fill our fear of being alone. We put up too many boundaries to store up protection to fill our unhealed wounds. We people-please to store up the affection of others so we can feel significant. We overshare on social media to store up fame and popularity to fill our void of acceptance. When our sense of value is in this world and not God, we will anxiously store up for the rest of our lives. 

But when we realize we are treasured by God, we don’t have to strive to store up worldly treasures for ourselves to fill a void that only God can fill. 

I’m not saying we don’t get jobs and start businesses and have savings accounts or pursue friendships or never share on social media. I’m saying we don’t place our trust in acquiring things but in God our provider. When we trust our value in God, we can stop striving and hustling knowing that we are well-kept women taken care of by our Heavenly Father.

We think our anxious striving somehow adds value to our lives, but Jesus tells us worry doesn't add any time to our lives. Our lives are valuable to God, our time is valuable, and to use the time we have here on earth to strive for the things of this world is a waste because it will never truly fill like like we think.

2. Consider the lilies of the field. 

If we don’t get to a point where we realize we are valuable to God, we will find ourselves in the second stage of the cycle of worry, where we seek the things of this world to fulfill the void that we choose not to allow God to fulfill like only He can. It’s then that Jesus tells us to “consider the lilies of the field.”

Not only is God going to fill your empty places like He fills a bird's empty stomach, He will cause you to grow and clothe you like the lilies of the field. Jesus says for us to consider how the lilies grow in beauty and splendor. God is our gardener who consistently supplies our needs as a source of life that will never run out.

When we run after the things of this world, it will never be enough, which is why we will continue to have to run, and seek and strive. But when we turn to the true source of life, our needs aren’t only fulfilled, but we flourish, we grow, we mature. 

Jesus tells us to look at the birds as a visual representation of the value He has for you and His power and desire to take care of you. But when He says consider the lilies, it requires the use of not our eyes but the use of our minds. We need to change our minds about where we search for our needs and what we strive for in this world. It's so interesting that we strive for money and status, and popularity because we really want protection, acceptance, and peace but guess what? Those things are not found in the worldly things that we often find ourselves striving for. Those are all the things that we find in Christ. 

So when we don’t seek Christ for what we really need and instead the things of this world, we often find ourselves in stage 3 of the cycle of worry, where our need and deficit grows bigger than it was in stage one. And we start the cycle all over again, but maybe instead of seeking money this time, we seek superficial relationships, and then we seek distraction, and then we seek alcohol and drugs, and then we seek sensuality and promiscuity, and pornography or overworking, and the void only gets bigger because the only way to fill a God-sized hole is with God Himself. So Jesus gives us the final step to get off the cycle of anxiety: seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness.

3. Seek first the Kingdom and His righteousness

Jesus already makes it clear in verse 24 that we can’t seek both God and money. Both God and the things of this world. He makes the connection that we are worried because we’re trying to do both, and He now closes the loop by saying do not worry, but seek the Kingdom. Because . . 

When we’re focused on God, we don’t have to worry about ourselves.

When we’re focused on God, we know He will take care of us.

When we’re focused on God, Jesus says all these things will be added to us. 

Jesus says it’s the Gentiles or non-believers who seek after these things, but not the children of God. Not the people that know they are valuable to God and taken care of by God and provided by God. When we look to the birds and consider the lilies, and we know who we are as God’s children, we have the freedom to seek Him without worrying about the things of this world. We don’t have to live divided, but we’re free to live devoted to God.

When my son gets home from school, he asks me almost every day,  “what are we going to eat for dinner?” Often asking even before saying, “hello, how are you?” because when my kids get home, they are so hungry. So hungry. But my son doesn’t ask me, “are you going to feed me today?” He already assumes we’re going to eat dinner. He’s not asking out of worry, wondering if I’m going to allow him to go hungry, he's asking out of expectation because there is not a day that goes by that I don’t feed those kids. 

There is not a day that goes by where God does not feed the birds of the air. There is not a day that goes by that God doesn’t clothe the lilies of the field, and there is not a day that goes by that God will not take care of you. 

You are free from the worry of seeking the things of this world to seek the God that loves you and provides all your needs. 

Seeking the Kingdom means seeking God’s will. Look for what He wants and His purpose for your life. Seeking His righteousness means achieving His will and purpose in His way. Oftentimes, we want to control, and even when we know God’s will, we still want to do it our way. This is why Jesus says, “Seek the Kingdom and His righteousness.” We often leave that last part out about seeking His righteousness. But worry will still win if we’re not in alignment with both God’s will and His way. Because His way is the only path to truly get to His will. And we know what God’s path is because He tells us in His word. Psalm 119:105 says:

God’s Word tells us the path to take, It is the instruction manual on how to seek the Kingdom. We don’t know what the future holds, but we know this is the right path to take. So Jesus says don’t even worry about tomorrow. Again, he says this after saying therefore. So in light of God taking care of us because He values us and will provide for our needs, we don’t have to worry about the future as we seek God and His righteousness. Are there real concerns and problems awaiting us in the future? Most likely. But what’s worrying going to do about that but make you miserable today. Jesus says today has enough trouble. Why take on today and tomorrow when all you have is today? God promises to take care of you today. The birds don’t store up for tomorrow because God feeds them today. We don’t have to worry about tomorrow because God’s promise is for today. The Bible says His mercies are made new each day, so we find God’s grace and peace in today, not worrying about and trying to control tomorrow. 

We were not made to control; we were made to trust God who controls everything. So when we come out of alignment and try to do God’s job, we don’t gain control, we gain worry. When we seek the things of this world instead of the Kingdom of God, we don’t get peace, we get more problems. When we seek our righteousness and not His, we don't gain, we lose. But when we align ourselves with God and seek His kingdom as we are told to do, and surrender to His will by trusting Him, we receive the peace, and fullness that our souls desire from the very beginning. 

So let me know. What's the next step you need to take to get off the crazy cycle of worry? I look forward to chatting with you in the comments.

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As always, thank you so much for watching and until next time, be beautiful, be blessed, and be loved.